Tianjin Trip: Part 2 - Transition Seminar

The primary reason our family traveled to Tianjin the second weekend in March was to attend a "Leaving Well" seminar sponsored by the Tianjin International School.  Not only was this seminar interactive and fun - for Emily and I as well as the older two kids - but it also introduced us to key practices to help our upcoming return to the U.S. in practical ways.  It helped us understand healthy ways to both prepare to leave our life here in Shanghai and begin to set up a new life in Minneapolis.

The staff at the school did an incredible job of hosting, including having a delicious formal lunch.

The seminar was very interactive as both the kids and adults had an opportunity to make crafts to help us more deeply understand the concepts from the class.

Below is Miriam's beautiful picture of leaving China.  On the left is her Chinese nick name (美) transposed on top of "M" representing how she feels both Chinese and American; on the right is her heart that is a mixture of both cultures.

Miriam's Picture

Asa also got into the action by making a raft; this raft is a teaching tool to help the kids understand key practices for healthy transition through R.A.F.T. (Reconcile, Affirm, Farwell, Think Destination).

Asa and His Raft

Emily and I also got into the craft action by building a picture of transition.  A key concept was that of "apairofducks" or paradox, which points out that in any transition there are both happy changes (AKA "yeah ducks") and sad changes (AKA "yuck ducks").  We want to fully process both the happy and the sad while making sure we have a lot of fun in the process.

A Pair of Ducks Having Fun

It's impossible to summarize a day-long session on transition.  However, the fundamentals are captured in this slide I shared with a group of expatriates here in Shanghai.

Below is more detail about these 4 key ideas and how we are using them as a family:

• Transition is a Process:  We are already preparing physically and emotionally for our move date of June 29 and expect to need up to a year to feel at "home" after we move to Minneapolis. 
• Rock: Our family routines bring stability to our lives and the lives of our children - even as the world around them changes.  This means scheduled time as a family (Daddy Dates, Family Nights, etc) and as a couple (weekly dates) are even more important than normal.
• Paper: Time moves especially fast in transition and we want to intentionally capture favorite places and times with dear friends. Posting pictures on this blog plays a critical role as does being very deliberate about setting up time with friends before we leave.
• Scissors: It takes a significant amount of energy to prepare for and execute transition, which means we need to focus on doing less in the transition period.  

If you want to learn more about ideas on leaving well, these blog posts from the instructor of our course are invaluable tools:

• Rock - http://www.thecultureblend.com/?p=1056
• Paper - http://www.thecultureblend.com/?p=1124
• Scissors - http://www.thecultureblend.com/?p=1174

Tianjin Trip: Part 1 - A Changing Neighborhood and Friends

The first weekend in March we had the opportunity to visit my (Joab's) "hometown" here in China - Tianjin.  Believe it or not, nearly 17 years ago I had the opportunity to spend nearly 1 year in Tianjin, which is about an hour south of Beijing by train, studying Chinese.  Not only did I learn a ton about Chinese language and culture, but I met many dear friends - many of whom I am still in touch with today.

The first day we were in Tianjin we visited some of these friends who live in Tianjin's Muslim area made up most of ethnic Hui - one of China's largest Muslim minorities.  We were able to see first hand how this community is physically being transformed - as an entire neighborhood of one story homes are being converted into high rise apartment blocks.  In the midst of this change, the community is clearly finding ways to maintain their traditions and customs.  

A tower at the neighborhood mosque

The entrance to the men's worship hall

The Old and The New: 

The rubble of the one story buildings with the apartment buildings in the background

A panoramic view of the old neighborhood with the Mosque tower in the middle

The entrance to the new apartment compound with traditional architecture

Though our time with our friends was brief the kids enjoyed connecting with their children.  They have a lot in common having both grown up in China and attended local schools.

A trip to my old "hometown" isn't complete without some great food.  Here Em is enjoying candied haw-fruit, which we can get in Shanghai, but is much tastier (and cheaper) up North!  Em's hand signal is telling us the total (for 2) was only 6 yuan as apposed to 5 yuan each here in Shanghai.

The Lord of the Double Daddy Dates

Today the older two kids (Miriam 11 and Asa 8) dubbed "The Lord of the Double Daddy Dates as I (Joab) spent nearly the entire day with them going to special places and connecting with dear friends.  After serving at Miriam's Sunday School class we headed for our favorite restaurant for Shanghai food - Jesse Restaurant in Xintiandi.

The kids enjoyed some of the favorite dishes including - Shanghai Style Braised Pork Belly and Dates Stuffed with Sticky Rice.  We also had a blast reading our favorite sections of "The Hobbit" - a preview for our afternoon activity.

Later in the afternoon we went to see "The Desolation of Smaug" in 3D with some of their favorite friends - Anna and Elijah Bowman.  It is hard to believe it, but we have been friends with the Bowman family nearly the entire time we have lived in Shanghai, which began in the fall of 2007.